How do I even do this? Am I to describe myself? Am I to bring some new insight to the table? I’ll try my best.
To be honest, I want to write about observations I make. It stings sometimes when the smallest thing occurs and for hours, I obsess over it. When I write, it gets out of my system. It itches at me, knowing how much injustice there is out there. It is so deeply rooted, sometimes I wonder if there is even a point, if things never really get better.
The humanity of people is raw and painful. The sentence doesn’t make sense to me, grammatically, but because of what I mean, I can’t enjoy films or tv shows anymore. It’s too real. I already see people at their worst, and at the pinnacle of their humiliation. Why do I want to watch someone spiral into alcoholism on a tv show when I can see it in real life? It’s the same reason why I love horror books but hate live action horror. It’s too real for me.
Life is meant to be lived. We should all go out there and feel some more. Connect with people, make ourselves live a little longer. When I am with one of my friends, all we do is live. We don’t think first, we don’t constantly check our phones, we do the dumbest things. Today we rode around in a shopping cart. Real dumb idea, but sometimes we’re just real dumb.
It annoys me really how disrespectful we can be to each other, how inhumane. We don’t connect so it’s easier to say hurtful things- you cannot place yourself in the person’s shoes for God’s sake. You cannot picture it happening to you. So we all join in on something akin to The Lottery by Shirley Jackson. We dehumanize a person REAL FAST. We tear into them and babush they’re down.
I hope that I’ve managed explaining who I am, what I believe and why I’m here.